Splish, Splash, I Was Taking A Bath

Day 3: Whitewater Rafting through the Rainforest
How do I start with this day? Ashleigh and I have both agreed that this was by far our favourite day in the entire trip. It was such an eye-opener. Please bear with me, this one is going to be a novel.

It began with us waking up at 5:30am….because every sane person knows that waking someone up at an ungodly hour and throwing them into swift rapids and jagged rocks will always end pleasantly. We were picked up by the “Raging Thunder” rafting company bus and it was packed with other tourists. So we weren’t the only crazy people who had death wishes (see Mum & Dad, Mr. & Mrs. Warren).

We headed up to the Tully River, which is known for the best whitewater rafting in Australia due to its surroundings and rapids. This river twists and turns itself through the rainforest, which makes for beautiful views. The Tully River is made up of grade 3-4 level rapids. According to the brochure, these rapids are moderate technical rapids with the need to hold on at times and continuous need to manoeuvre the raft with the possibility of overturning. The scale goes up to grade 6, which probably consists of “kiss-you-ass-goodbye” rapids. We’ll just stick to grade 3-4 rapids thank you.

On the bus, we were supposed to be shown a video on safety and what to do when you fall out of the raft. Pretty crucial stuff. But of course, why would one expect anything to go right when Ash and I are involved? God hates us. The VCR was malfunctioning, so one of the guides got up and briefed us. So, what was supposed to be a 10-minute video was now condensed into a one-minute speech that no one could hear over the microphone feedback. After this quasi-safety lesson, we were then give liability forms to sign. It was pretty much like, “If you get injured or lose a limb, don’t sue. If you die, don’t have your dad sue.” Comforting.

So, we finally reached our destination. There were at least 12 river guides setting up our gear. Ash looked out of the bus, pointed at the most chiseled man out of the bunch, and said “I want him as our guide”. That’s my girl! We got out and met the rest of our crew. There was Matt and Tom, two friends from the UK, and a couple from the UK as well, Steve and Katherine.

And finally, for one brief moment when God was probably not paying attention, our luck changed. Our guide turned out to be Vince, aka the chiseled man that Ashleigh pointed out earlier. Score! But what was embarrassing was the fact that earlier I thought that one of the British guys was our guide and walked straight up to him and asked him if he could tighten my helmet for me. He had this strange look on his face and tried to help, but didn’t quite fix the problem. I was thinking in my head, “Great! This is the guy who is supposed to lead us safely down the river?” Oops.

Anyway, Vince helps all of us with our gear and finds out that Ash and I are from Canada. He then tells me that he will have to ask a question later. Okay….. So we head down the forest towards the river. Once we get to the tip of the river, it really hit me. You see these yellow rafts, which are tied to these wooden pools, thrashing about in the river. You can hear the crashing water down the river and either it was my adrenaline-induced delusions or just the wind, but I thought I heard people screaming. Oh boy.

We hop into the raft and Vince introduces us to Hacky, a guy who is training to be a river guide as well. He was going to paddle with us, which was fine with us seeing that he would be another person that could save us. Vince then goes through some safety procedures with us. And once again, they are far too quick and vague. He teaches us some manoeuvres that are crucial to stay afloat. There are moves that require the entire right side of the boat to jump over to the left side and vice versa. There’s also the “tell my mother I love her” move, where everyone has to jump into the middle of the boat, keep their paddle up, and hang on for dear life. I liked that one.

Then it began.

We set our raft into the river and immediately started to paddle. Our first rapid was called “The Alarm Clock”. This one is supposed to wake everyone up and introduce us to the world of rafting. It was thrilling and scary and confusing and liberating all at the same time. My adrenaline was pumping and that was it.



I was hooked.

We hit a more calm area and Vince asked all of us to hop out of the raft. He was going to teach us how to float safely down the river if we ever fell over. The position requires you to sit up with your legs straight in front of you and arms out. So we floated around a little and got to know our crew a little more. We really had to watch out for the little rocks though; the ones that don’t break the surface of the water. Two words: rock enema. Poor Steve got one of those.

Getting back into the raft was hilarious. Our guide wanted to see if we could get ourselves back into the raft ourselves just in case he wasn’t there to help us. Sure, all the men did it without a hitch. Ashleigh and I? We looked like flailing fish trying to free themselves from a fishing net. Not graceful at all. We were thrashing about but not getting anywhere near the inside of the raft. So after laughs all around, Vince decided to put us out of our misery. Let me tell you, this man is strong. He grabbed us and just flopped us back into the raft without breaking a sweat. Ladies, he’s married.

As we paddled along, he finally asked me the question he wanted to earlier. He asked why every time he wrestles with Canadians, they tend to wrap their legs around his waist as a strategic move. I explained to him that it’s a Canadian thing called “The Scissors” and that he wouldn’t understand. I really had no idea what he was talking about, but at least it looked like I did. We all joked around some more and for some reason, the running theme throughout the entire trip down the river revolved around buttocks. I’m not joking. The entire ride down the river. Well, what do you expect when you get four British people, two Canadians, one Korean in training, and one cheeky Australian in one raft?

Back to serious rafting. As we paddled our way through a couple more rapids, Vince stopped us. He told us that there was a rapid coming up called “The Double Waterfall”. Uh huh. He told us that in order to manoeuvre through this rapid, we would have to squeeze our raft though a gap in between two massive rocks that was half our size. Uh huh. The water through this gap was really strong, so we had to be quick on our feet….or bums. We would have to jump right, and then immediately jump left to keep the raft afloat. After that, we would have to get down into the middle of the boat straight away and pray. It was such a rush. We stayed afloat and didn’t lose anyone. However, as we paddled away, we saw another raft flip over. Beginners.

There was one rapid that did give us a little trouble. I believe it was called “Wet & Moisty”. The rapid started to push us in circle. It was seriously like a whirlpool. Water was rushing into our raft while we were continuously spinning. Vince to the rescue. He manoeuvred us out of this vortex all by himself, as Ash and I watched in amazement. So, instead of fearing for our lives, we were swooning. Typical.

We were approaching where we were going to have lunch, but as we were closing in on our docking site, we spotted this beautiful waterfall. It was straight out of National Geographic. It was cascading off the rainforest walls and into the river. All the rafts were going underneath it for a refreshing soak. We took off all of our gear and went under it with our raft. It was so cool and rejuvenating. It was hilarious though. I was closer to the wall of the rocks, so the water wasn’t falling that heavily there. I was enjoying a nice drizzle. But where Ashleigh was, the water was falling with a lot of force. I see her just getting pelted by the water. Poor Ash.

It was lunchtime, so we tied up our raft with the other rafts. We met other rafters and no one seemed to be hurt or without a limb, which is always good. After lunch, we headed back. This was when we faced our biggest challenge, “The Disappearing Falls”. We were supposed to go over it with our raft.

Um…how about no?

Just kidding. That wasn’t the falls. The real waterfall was about a two and a half metre drop. But that’s still a big drop to go over on a raft. If we were to have stayed in our present positions, we would have definitely flung the people in the back out. So, Vince told all of us to cram ourselves into the front compartment. We all had to sit up there and hug each other as we went over the falls. Not surprisingly, we all fell out. Katherine kneed Tom in the face and he began to bleed. It wasn’t serious though, just a superficial cut.

In celebration of….well…not dying, it was photo time. Every raft went ashore and took pictures. Vince, not one to be upstaged by others, flipped our raft upside-down. We were going to form a pyramid. Men on the bottom and women on top. The lightest person would understandably be on top. I don’t know how I got that position. Was I the lightest? Hell no!!! Ashleigh was just quick to the draw and volunteered me. Could I look more like the girl from “The Ring” with all of my hair in front of my face? Good times.

We then hit a nice calm part of the river, which was perfect for some rafting games. The game consisted of two people balancing on the ends of the raft while the others paddled in unison to spin the raft in a circle. The first one to fall out of the raft would owe the other a pint. This was definitely worth playing for. Ashleigh, being the more sane and rational one out of the two of us, opted just to watch and laugh at me. I failed all the ladies. I lost twice. The whole thing about women being better at balancing? Lies.

As we paddled on, we encountered the funniest moment of the day. There was a raft that was filled with cute little Japanese girls. They had all just gone for a swim and were waiting for their river guide to lift them back onto the raft. He reached for one of the girls. We watched as he hauled her up with so much force that she flew off the other side of the raft and back into the water. Our raft just erupted. I have never cried so much from laughing. It was probably one of those “you had to be there” moments.

After regaining our composure, we continued on down the river. That’s when we encountered “Jabba The Hut”. It was this gigantic rock that protruded out of the water. Some people were getting out of their rafts, climbing the rock, and jumping off. I don’t think the rationality and sanity that Ashleigh practices ever formed in me. (To Mr. & Mrs. Warren: you’ve raised a very level-headed daughter). So, I was definitely going for it. I must admit though, walking to the edge of that rock was really terrifying. But when will I ever get to jump off a massive rock into a river that runs through a rainforest again? So, I went for it. Just picture Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid…only with a smaller rock…and without the loveliness that is Paul Newman. Simply exhilarating.

We got back into the raft and continued on. We were closing in on the end of a 5-hour long rafting experience. At this time, Ash and I really began to grasp what we were doing. We realized that when you are paddling (struggling to stay alive), you cannot fully appreciate your surroundings. This was when we were just absorbing everything. The scenery, the sounds, the atmosphere. I think I saw a tear in Ashleigh’s eye….or it could have just been a drop of river water, but I’d like to think it was a tear.

Anyway, we docked and loaded all of our gear back onto the bus. We headed back to the Raging Thunder headquarters to purchase some photos that they took of us. This is when people ice their wounds, have a nice cold one, muse over what happened during the day….and pay up if you lost the rafting game. No, they didn’t force me to buy them a beer. Nice British gents. Ash and I took a picture with Vince (for swooning purposes later on), but wouldn’t you know it? God was paying attention this time. The picture didn’t turn out. Well, it was nice while it lasted.

We got back to our hostel that night and just passed out. Boy, were we sore the next day. Well, there it is. Our favourite day.

Jess

Showers: 1 (really long and hot one)
Bruises: 3
Laughs: millions